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Gnome Humor / FOOTBALL!
Last post by medimus - March 26, 2025, 04:58:04 pmIt was crazy hard to get, but I got a ticket to the Super Bowl. It took me almost 40 minutes to climb nearly to the top of the "cheap seats" where my seat was (and believe me, "cheap" isn't the right word). When I got my breath back from the climb I found that I could hardly see the field. But I could see just well enough to notice that there was an empty seat about five rows back nearly at at 50 yard line, and as the second quarter started it was still empty.
I figured I really didn't have much to lose, so I made my way down there. Sitting next to it was an older gentleman, and I asked him if anybody was sitting there. He looked over at me and replied, "No, have a seat."
It was a fantastic seat, with an amazing view. I asked the guy if he knew whose seat it was and why they weren't there at such an important event. He told me that for ten years it had been his wife's seat, but that she'd passed away.
I really felt sorry for the guy, and asked him if he didn't have a friend or family member that he could have offered the seat to instead of just leaving it vacant. "No," he responded. "They're all at the funeral."
I figured I really didn't have much to lose, so I made my way down there. Sitting next to it was an older gentleman, and I asked him if anybody was sitting there. He looked over at me and replied, "No, have a seat."
It was a fantastic seat, with an amazing view. I asked the guy if he knew whose seat it was and why they weren't there at such an important event. He told me that for ten years it had been his wife's seat, but that she'd passed away.
I really felt sorry for the guy, and asked him if he didn't have a friend or family member that he could have offered the seat to instead of just leaving it vacant. "No," he responded. "They're all at the funeral."
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Gnome Humor / Doctors and Poker
Last post by medimus - March 02, 2025, 10:56:07 pmA doctor is at home when the phone rings. He answers it and hears, "Dr Epstein? This is Mansfield in Radiology. Can you come over to my house right now? We need a fourth for poker."
Epstein turns to his wife and says, "I have to go, dear. It's an emergency."
The wife look up and asks, "Is it serious?"
Epstein nods. "Yes, it is. There are three doctors there already."
Epstein turns to his wife and says, "I have to go, dear. It's an emergency."
The wife look up and asks, "Is it serious?"
Epstein nods. "Yes, it is. There are three doctors there already."
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Public Discussion / Re: Miro Writes!
Last post by medimus - January 27, 2025, 03:32:16 pmFun non-logical twist ending on that one. 
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Public Discussion / Re: Miro Writes!
Last post by Miro - January 25, 2025, 07:53:37 pmPrompt(s): stream of consciousness
Title: Three and a Half
Word Count: 1,694
Genre: Comedy/humor
About: The author has less than three and a half hours to write a story from scratch with absolutely no idea what to write about.
More Info: Did this one back in 2018, but it's one of my favorites. Written in just under three and a half hours with minimal editing. And features Miro! (no correlation)
Link: Linky
Title: Three and a Half
Word Count: 1,694
Genre: Comedy/humor
About: The author has less than three and a half hours to write a story from scratch with absolutely no idea what to write about.
More Info: Did this one back in 2018, but it's one of my favorites. Written in just under three and a half hours with minimal editing. And features Miro! (no correlation)
Link: Linky
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Public Discussion / Miro Writes!
Last post by Miro - January 17, 2025, 07:38:27 pmKinda. Sorta. She tries at least. 
Mostly in response to writing prompts from writing groups or reddit. There are a few that I could share, but I'll just start with this one I finished last week and hopefully there will be more throughout the year. Links are google docs.
Prompt(s): sheriff's badge, outsider, antihero
Title: The Defenestration of Carl Levitt
Word Count: 6,635
Genre: Detective/Mystery
About: There's a new sheriff in town and she doesn't take kindly to how lax these youngins are getting on the job. While everyone's quick to write off the case as an accident, Gwendolyn's sure there's more to it than it seems.
More Info: I've never written something in this genre before and a lot of the inspiration for it comes from watching and discussing murder mysteries with my mom, who I also based Gwendolyn after.
Link: Linky
Mostly in response to writing prompts from writing groups or reddit. There are a few that I could share, but I'll just start with this one I finished last week and hopefully there will be more throughout the year. Links are google docs.Prompt(s): sheriff's badge, outsider, antihero
Title: The Defenestration of Carl Levitt
Word Count: 6,635
Genre: Detective/Mystery
About: There's a new sheriff in town and she doesn't take kindly to how lax these youngins are getting on the job. While everyone's quick to write off the case as an accident, Gwendolyn's sure there's more to it than it seems.
More Info: I've never written something in this genre before and a lot of the inspiration for it comes from watching and discussing murder mysteries with my mom, who I also based Gwendolyn after.
Link: Linky
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Gnome Humor / Re: Corporate lingo
Last post by medimus - December 23, 2024, 02:44:13 pmThere was a song? 
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Gnome Humor / Re: Corporate lingo
Last post by Miro - December 21, 2024, 04:22:06 pmSo accurately corporate that it kept activating the switch in my brain that tunes out nonsense words. Now the whole song is just a blur.
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Gnome Humor / Corporate lingo
Last post by Kiras - December 20, 2024, 07:43:46 pmI just had to post this perfect song 
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Gnome Humor / Oh, Yoda...!
Last post by medimus - December 20, 2024, 04:16:04 pmImages in SimpleMachines are a pain. Click to enlarge...
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Gnome Humor / Falconry
Last post by medimus - December 12, 2024, 02:54:02 pmIf you wear a falconry glove to the park and then walk around, looking upwards all frantic and nervous-like -- all those people with small yappy dogs will leave.